Hey! Now available for achieving your weight loss dreams! A proven system that says, "People think I'm sick, I'm dying." It's so easy, you won't even have to change your lifestyle, except picking up your kids from school because, "the children, they would be scared." Yes, for the totally reasonable cost of $1500 for 10 days you can experience the feeling that others fear you have been stricken with cancer and will frighten small children.
The above quotes come from a recent NYT piece on what apparently is a new fad diet amongst brides-to-be. It involves intubation through the nose with a bag of nutrient liquid that you carry around. It delivers about 800 calories and promises between 15 and 20 lbs of weight lost over the 10 day period. The selling point is, of course, that you will fit into your wedding gown and look great for your pictures.
Look, I enjoyed my wedding, I participated in some of it's planning and in a general sense cared that it went off well. I wanted the photos to look nice but most of that centered around the fact that I am relatively incapable of manufacturing a photogenic smile. It's pretty horrendous in fact. However, even though I helped plan our wedding, it's safe to say that I, like most men, was not as consumed by it as most women seem to be.
I liked our wedding photos a lot, my lovely wife looks amazing (and still does btw), and I look like f-ing James Bond. Ok, maybe if James Bond had a youthful side kick intended to make him look cooler I'd look like that guy. Anyways, my point is that I fail to see the benefit of shoving a tube up your nose in order to lose weight so you look skinny for 6 hours. I mean, I've looked at lots of people's wedding photos and everybody looks great! I can't remember looking at a wedding photo and saying, "Yikes! that's no muffin top, it's a whole cake." There have been some dresses that I thought were....interesting, but the bride looked fine. Big smiles, teary eyes, proud parents and friends. Great photos all.
So, I guess I just don't get it. The tube diet thing just seems extreme to me. It's fraught with risks according to the piece and requires that a person be 'confident enough to wear the tube in public', just not around small children apparently. The woman featured in the piece has young daughters, what message is she sending to them about next year's picture day?
I understand that people want to look nice for their wedding photos, to have someone open your album and say, "Oh! you look gorgeous!" On the other hand, do you want them thinking to themselves at the same time, "Wow! she looked so great at the wedding. What happened?"
Ridiculously Fit Person of the Day - Sue Fleming
Sue is also mentioned in the NYT piece as writer of "Buff Brides". She works in New York as a personal trainer and has carved out a nice gig on TV and in print as an exercise and lifestyle coach for potential newlyweds.
At approximately 1% the cost you can buy her book and achieve the results you want lasting far beyond the honeymoon.
Me and My iPod -
In training mode for Bloomsday. I'm behind on my schedule but I'll get there. Only got in 5 miles total last week. Have done two 3 milers this week and I'm leaving after I finish this post for another one. Next week I'll bump up to 4's and 5's. Have to work on my pacing a little bit. The problem with getting behind on my schedule isn't that I won't make it, just that I'll be slower than I want to.
On the iPod this week - This American Life and WTF - Fred Willard was great, full of funny stories.
OK GO is good, Classic metal seems to be my thing lately. If you want to talk pacing, try running on beat to, "Rock and Roll" by Led Zepplin. You'll need a towel.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Hey....Corporate bohemoth! Little guy trying to make it here
So, should I be upset? I mean, I'm a little upset right now. I was just about to go off to bed and feed the ego a bit by seeing if my pageviews have increased. It's stupid I know but I won't deny that its cool when the numbers go up. I flip open the laptop, type 'ridiculously fit' into the google search bar and, as usual, my blog pops up. This time I notice, however, that some facebook page is titled the same thing so I curiously click on said link.
It's some gal hawking meal replacement shakes and filling up her page with 'inspriational' pictures that have catchy get tough and get moving type statements. Then, Horror of Horrors I see her tagline. "Are you Ridiculously Fit? So, why don't we learn a few things and then DO a few things and see what happens!" Until just a week ago, I had the EXACT same thing....I thought of it......I wrote it.......I put it up on MY blog back in July when I started this thing. Along the way Blogger came out with this nifty new template with flipping cards for your posts and customizable views for readers. It was ok, but the main header left off half of my tagline. SO, I decided to delete it and then ultimately, I just went back to the regular page layout you see here. I wish I hadn't done that now!
This was the old one I had, "Are you Ridiculously Fit? Yeah, me neither. SO, why don't we learn a few things, then DO a few things and see what happens?" I thought it was cool in a, "We're all in this together," type of way. Apparently so did she. Now, to be fair, I haven't written anything regularly for a few months and she just joined Facebook in February. So, I suppose it might be possible to argue that she determined that my blog was dead and that my tag was fair game. But it still feels, I'll say it, shitty.
Then, I was thinking, "What the hell is shakeology?" If you like, you may do your own 10 minute internet search but I'll give you the cliff's notes. It is a massive cross product marketing campaign which seems to be run by the P90x people. A certified Shakeologist comes from the college of Beachbody Coaching and can help you achieve all of your fitness dreams. It's a great supplement to your homebased workout programs like, the aforementioned P90x, Insanity workout, Turbo Fire, and let's not forget the Brazil Butt Lift.
The reason I know that it's a great supplement to those programs is because when you type in 'Shakeology the first three autofill words are "review", "cleanse", and "scam". Let's take each of these in order shall we.
"Shakeology review" results bring you not impartial third parties doing consumer watchdogging. Rather, each 'reviewer' appears to be one of these Beachbody Coaches reviewing their own product. My favorite is one that isn't even a person it just says, "Unbiased review" and then at the top of the page is a Shakeology ad. I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure Leonardo DiCaprio can't write a review of Inception, but I for sure know that Eddie Murphy wishes he could.
"Shakeology Cleanse" brings more of the same with detailed instructions on how their fantastic program works. Again we see some of the same websites but that seems to be expected.
"Shakeology Scam" was showing promise! Not only has my intellectual property been usurped by some powder peddler but it's also a scam to boot! My righteous indignation shall be justified! Gleefully I clicked on the top result, "Shakeology Scam - DO not buy Shakeology!" This has to be my favorite part. THIS GUY IS A BEACHBODY COACH TOO! It's a bait and switch headline. He gently tells you that it's ok to be skeptical but that it worked for him and it can work for you too. The next 10 or so results for 'scam' are also ALL in the affiliate program.
When earning your Shakeologist badge at the Beachbody Coaching camp I imagine that the camp's Director stands at the podium and divides everyone into groups.
"Alright boys and girls, listen closely, Listeeeeennnn!, the Left side of the room is our reviewers. The right side...yes, Johnny, I know that's my left hand...your right, the right side of the room. You folks get to take the scam angle, and the center....(claps hands together in gesture)...The center of the room you may pick either and also put up the 'how to' posts. Also, the weekend social is on hold until I get some volunteers to wash the egg off my car." (crowd groans in disappointment while a small section chuckles)
It's not like I had copyrighted that tagline, and if she was just some other trainer/shake seller in Ohio I might even be able to go so far as to feel flattered I guess. But for her to be part of this huge corporate conglomerate multi-level marking scheme made it seem rude. At this point all I can hope for is that I've mentioned Shakeology enough times to warrant a spot on the search results and toss a little monkey wrench in their well oiled machine.
Who knows? They may read my posts about juicing and decide that I'm a perfect scholarship candidate for a Shakeology degree. I can't wait for the weekend social!
It's some gal hawking meal replacement shakes and filling up her page with 'inspriational' pictures that have catchy get tough and get moving type statements. Then, Horror of Horrors I see her tagline. "Are you Ridiculously Fit? So, why don't we learn a few things and then DO a few things and see what happens!" Until just a week ago, I had the EXACT same thing....I thought of it......I wrote it.......I put it up on MY blog back in July when I started this thing. Along the way Blogger came out with this nifty new template with flipping cards for your posts and customizable views for readers. It was ok, but the main header left off half of my tagline. SO, I decided to delete it and then ultimately, I just went back to the regular page layout you see here. I wish I hadn't done that now!
This was the old one I had, "Are you Ridiculously Fit? Yeah, me neither. SO, why don't we learn a few things, then DO a few things and see what happens?" I thought it was cool in a, "We're all in this together," type of way. Apparently so did she. Now, to be fair, I haven't written anything regularly for a few months and she just joined Facebook in February. So, I suppose it might be possible to argue that she determined that my blog was dead and that my tag was fair game. But it still feels, I'll say it, shitty.
Then, I was thinking, "What the hell is shakeology?" If you like, you may do your own 10 minute internet search but I'll give you the cliff's notes. It is a massive cross product marketing campaign which seems to be run by the P90x people. A certified Shakeologist comes from the college of Beachbody Coaching and can help you achieve all of your fitness dreams. It's a great supplement to your homebased workout programs like, the aforementioned P90x, Insanity workout, Turbo Fire, and let's not forget the Brazil Butt Lift.
The reason I know that it's a great supplement to those programs is because when you type in 'Shakeology the first three autofill words are "review", "cleanse", and "scam". Let's take each of these in order shall we.
"Shakeology review" results bring you not impartial third parties doing consumer watchdogging. Rather, each 'reviewer' appears to be one of these Beachbody Coaches reviewing their own product. My favorite is one that isn't even a person it just says, "Unbiased review" and then at the top of the page is a Shakeology ad. I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure Leonardo DiCaprio can't write a review of Inception, but I for sure know that Eddie Murphy wishes he could.
"Shakeology Cleanse" brings more of the same with detailed instructions on how their fantastic program works. Again we see some of the same websites but that seems to be expected.
"Shakeology Scam" was showing promise! Not only has my intellectual property been usurped by some powder peddler but it's also a scam to boot! My righteous indignation shall be justified! Gleefully I clicked on the top result, "Shakeology Scam - DO not buy Shakeology!" This has to be my favorite part. THIS GUY IS A BEACHBODY COACH TOO! It's a bait and switch headline. He gently tells you that it's ok to be skeptical but that it worked for him and it can work for you too. The next 10 or so results for 'scam' are also ALL in the affiliate program.
When earning your Shakeologist badge at the Beachbody Coaching camp I imagine that the camp's Director stands at the podium and divides everyone into groups.
"Alright boys and girls, listen closely, Listeeeeennnn!, the Left side of the room is our reviewers. The right side...yes, Johnny, I know that's my left hand...your right, the right side of the room. You folks get to take the scam angle, and the center....(claps hands together in gesture)...The center of the room you may pick either and also put up the 'how to' posts. Also, the weekend social is on hold until I get some volunteers to wash the egg off my car." (crowd groans in disappointment while a small section chuckles)
It's not like I had copyrighted that tagline, and if she was just some other trainer/shake seller in Ohio I might even be able to go so far as to feel flattered I guess. But for her to be part of this huge corporate conglomerate multi-level marking scheme made it seem rude. At this point all I can hope for is that I've mentioned Shakeology enough times to warrant a spot on the search results and toss a little monkey wrench in their well oiled machine.
Who knows? They may read my posts about juicing and decide that I'm a perfect scholarship candidate for a Shakeology degree. I can't wait for the weekend social!
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